Finding Purpose Beyond Our Pain

By Paul Meier and David L. Henderson

What Doesn’t Kill You Might Make You Strong

Books on pain and struggle appeal to many people because we all go through difficulties in our lives.  This one is especially timely, given the current economic slowdown, middle-east wars, unemployment, and other problems confronting society.  While the book doesn’t address these problems directly, it can help people who are coping with distress by turning their attention to the thought that God can replace our losses with greater gains.

Meier and Henderson share seven universal struggles: Injustice, Rejection, Loneliness, Loss, Discipline, Failure, and Death.  I love the quote that opens the book at the Introduction:  “I will not cause pain without allowing something new to be born,” says the Lord, Isaiah 66:9 NCV.

The book is biblically based and well researched.  Believers who have read other books of this type may not find a lot of new ground, but it is good to be reminded of truths we may have learned and forgotten. 

I found much to underline in my copy of the book. 

The section on loss was particularly helpful.  In the chapter titled, “What Have You Got to Lose?” the authors touch on losses the average person doesn’t automatically think about, such as significance, time, love, luxuries and control.  This chapter is followed by “What Have You Got to Gain?” which covers possible gains that come from enduring the pain of loss and intimates that those gains are worth the sacrifices.

Helpful application sections throughout the book provide food for thought or discussion.

The chapter titled, “Know Yourself,” lists pride as one reason for refusal to change, as well as fear of losing control.  In the chapter on Death, emphasis is placed on the power of resurrection hope.  “The blessings of eternal life start as soon as “the Life” (Jesus) takes control of our own lives,” state the authors.

Many good quotes in this book: 

“The power to cope with the pain is in focusing on its purpose,” is found in the chapter on the Power of the Purpose. 

The authors define true success as contentment in life, stressing that contentment does not necessitate complacency.  While we strive for excellence, we live our lives with the mentality that “if the Lord wills, we will live and do this or that, but if He does not, we will not be devastated.”  James 4:15 Those who find that kind of success are the envy of the world, according to Meier and Henderson.

This is an interesting book that blends psychiatry and spiritually in a biblical way.   Not too difficult for the average reader to understand.                     

Reviewed by Carole Ledbetter, December 8, 2009